Day 1
(Kelvin rushes into office with heavy breath. Loosens tie and sits in his own chair.)
Carly: (Turns to Kelvin) So how did it go?
Kelvin: What do you think?
Carly: I don’t know but you do look pretty awful to me right now.
(Alex slowly walks over to Kelvin’s and Carly’s seats)
Alex: What about this time?
Kelvin: I wasn’t really expecting anything much after all the shit we gave this client. You give them shit, they give you shit. You weren’t expecting that they will budge with just one soothing meeting.. Were you?
Alex: (Grins) Well, I am not surprised at all.
Carly: Kelvin, look. I mean there is obviously a huge gap between how TCG views issues and how things work around here. If they wanna be on board, then things will have to work in our way, right? I mean..so what do we do now? What do they need so they can really start paying us. I am tired of serving this client who’s not even paying us.
Kelvin: Guys, let’s just take this to a room.
Alex: Sure.
Carly: Great.
(All three of them goes to look for a vacant conference room, and the only available room is the small room in the corner which no one can see, normally used by Human Resources people who always wanted to keep conversations private and confidential.)
Carly: But this is the HR room though.
Kelvin: They aren’t even using it now. (Goes into room)
(Everything settles in the room with just three chairs)
Kelvin: Look, guys. I don’t even know where to start but I know that we’ve all been working so hard to close this deal, all the countless hours of research, drafting reports…
Carly: I’m glad you noticed.
Alex: Were they happy with the report you gave them just now?
Kelvin: It’s tough to say but I’m pretty sure one report is not going to be enough. Plus, they’ve been complaining that it’s taking too long for us to come up with some decent work.
Carly: They will get decent work once they start paying.
Kelvin: They are talking about how it is taking too long.
Carly: You can talk to my boss about that. I can’t do the approvals.
Alex: I wonder what happened with Maysons when they had similar requests as TCG now. How did they stopped asking for reports? They demanded the same - actual decent work. It seems strange to me that they’ve been quiet these days.
Carly: I wasn’t here when it was the worst times with Maysons. Actually I’ve heard some pretty bad things with this account before I joined.
Kelvin: I can tell you guys the stories but whatever is
mentioned here, stays here.
(Alex smiles and Carly nods. Three of them sits closer together and Kelvin lowers his voice and mumbles.)
(Alex smiles and Carly nods. Three of them sits closer together and Kelvin lowers his voice and mumbles.)
Carly: Woah.
(Alex and Carly leans back into their chairs.)
Kelvin: So for Maysons, they got tired of us. It was like raping, constantly but to a point that they grew tired of it as well. You can only f*ck someone for so long till you lose interest.
Carly: Kelvin!
(Alex chuckles)
Carly: (trying to look serious yet laughing) Was that necessary?
Kelvin: Sorry Carly. I had to say that even if you are here. It couldn’t be more accurate than that.
Alex: (Grins) Classic metaphor.
Carly: Oh yea, and given that we are in the HR room.
Alex: Yea, we can be reported for sexual harassment.
Kelvin: Come on, you get what I mean.
Carly: Ha, yes. You didn’t have to go that explicit.
Kelvin: As I always say, there’s no better way.
Alex: (Still grinning) To the point.
Carly: So what now?
Kelvin: TCG wants hardcore data, we give them that. TCG wants big, fancy wordings, we give them that. TCG wants extreme customer service, we give them that. So when it comes to what we want, we can go bang the contract on their table, get it signed, close the deal. Then all go for a drink after all this shit is done.
Carly: What do you mean by extreme customer service?
Kelvin: Like how extreme I can go with my metaphors.
Alex: (Grins) We all get your metaphors, Kelvin.
Carly: Yea, you don’t have to repeat it. Ha.
Kelvin: So let’s get to work and redraft this piece of junk, ya?
Carly: (Gets up and ready to leave) Who said that my work was junk?
Kelvin: Mr.Dovacs did say that in the meeting today.
Carly: That piece of shit.
Alex: Carly, I thought you just said that this was the HR room.
Carly. Ya, I don’t care. I’m going to slam the contract in their face after this.
Kelvin: Nice, she’s ready to get to work.
Alex: So let’s do a follow up meeting tomorrow. Work is going to be ready by tomorrow this time, Carly?
Carly: You bet.
(Alex and Carly leans back into their chairs.)
Kelvin: So for Maysons, they got tired of us. It was like raping, constantly but to a point that they grew tired of it as well. You can only f*ck someone for so long till you lose interest.
Carly: Kelvin!
(Alex chuckles)
Carly: (trying to look serious yet laughing) Was that necessary?
Kelvin: Sorry Carly. I had to say that even if you are here. It couldn’t be more accurate than that.
Alex: (Grins) Classic metaphor.
Carly: Oh yea, and given that we are in the HR room.
Alex: Yea, we can be reported for sexual harassment.
Kelvin: Come on, you get what I mean.
Carly: Ha, yes. You didn’t have to go that explicit.
Kelvin: As I always say, there’s no better way.
Alex: (Still grinning) To the point.
Carly: So what now?
Kelvin: TCG wants hardcore data, we give them that. TCG wants big, fancy wordings, we give them that. TCG wants extreme customer service, we give them that. So when it comes to what we want, we can go bang the contract on their table, get it signed, close the deal. Then all go for a drink after all this shit is done.
Carly: What do you mean by extreme customer service?
Kelvin: Like how extreme I can go with my metaphors.
Alex: (Grins) We all get your metaphors, Kelvin.
Carly: Yea, you don’t have to repeat it. Ha.
Kelvin: So let’s get to work and redraft this piece of junk, ya?
Carly: (Gets up and ready to leave) Who said that my work was junk?
Kelvin: Mr.Dovacs did say that in the meeting today.
Carly: That piece of shit.
Alex: Carly, I thought you just said that this was the HR room.
Carly. Ya, I don’t care. I’m going to slam the contract in their face after this.
Kelvin: Nice, she’s ready to get to work.
Alex: So let’s do a follow up meeting tomorrow. Work is going to be ready by tomorrow this time, Carly?
Carly: You bet.
(Alex and Kelvin gets up.)
Carly: Same time tomorrow, where?
Kelvin: This room.
Alex: (Grins) Yea, the Metaphor Room.
Kelvin: This room.
Alex: (Grins) Yea, the Metaphor Room.
(Kelvin and Carly laughs.)
To be continued…
